Colman Domingo on Good Hang with Amy Poehler

Hello everyone and welcome to another

episode of Good Hang. We have an awesome

guest today, the great Coleman Domingo.

And Coleman and I have so much fun. We

we talk about his beautiful mother Edith

and how she shaped his life. We talk

about our shared love of dancing and why

it means so much to us. We talk about

peptides, what are they and who's taking

them. And we also celebrate the fact

that he is working with Steven Spielberg

in his new movie Disclosure Day, which

is coming out this week. Big summer hit,

Blockbuster Baby. Speaking of Steven

Spielberg, Stephen joins us as our uh as

our guest today who's going to talk to

us about Coleman. He's going to talk

well behind Coleman's back. And um if

you don't know who Stephen Spielberg is,

I don't know what to tell you. You know,

50 years ago, he made Jaws. last year he

was, you know, producing Hamnet and he's

made every single movie in between. So,

uh, Steven Spielberg, Mr. Spielberg, uh,

are you there?

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All I ever wanted.

>> Hi Amy.

>> Hi Stephen.

>> Oh my god. I'm on good hang. Good lord.

>> We got to get you into the stew.

>> We tried you. You We weren't We couldn't

schedule it.

>> Dang. Yeah, we were like, "We don't have

time."

>> Yeah, I tried. I tried. I got to make a

few more hits before I quit getting on

your show. We were like we we were like

we just want to see one or two more

things from Stephen before we say this.

>> Yeah, I know. I know. I love the

audition process.

>> Stephen, you are my subconscious. Like

this the work that you have made is in

my brain. You have you shaped my entire

life. You are a Gen X director through

and through.

>> Oh, thank you. Thank you. I I love I

love that I'm in your subconscious and

yet you can STILL BE FUNNY.

WITH MY plethora of comedies, you know.

>> Well, I mean, I feel like I've gotten a

chance to um been lucky enough to see

you at um you know, places and events

and shows and stuff and I got to see you

recently at the SNL 50th.

>> That was great. That was just great. It

was hard to believe. I mean, I you know,

I was there the first show in 1975. I

was in the audience.

>> Get out of here. Really?

>> Yeah. It was in the very first show.

Yeah. I flew all the way to New York as

it was in the air. It was it was one of

those things, you know, where my

generation suddenly was being included

in something that was going to define

define us. And um it was just an I just

somehow knew I had to be there for it

and I just, you know, got a ticket and

went in the audience and watched.

>> Where did you sit and watch? Were you on

the floor or were you up in the

bathroom?

>> No, no, I didn't know anybody. I just uh

I was I was in the stands. Jaws had come

out in June. I I think the first SNL

show was in October or September.

>> October 11th.

>> October. Yeah. And uh and I was there

and it was incredibly it spoke to me and

uh I after it was over I left with the

audience and somebody came running up

and grabbed me and dragged me kind of

backstage to Belushi.

And so John said, "You're the guy that

made the shark movie?" And I said,

"Yeah." He says, "You got to meet J

Danny." And he dragged me over to Danny.

And that was the beginning of my first

the first event that I really became a

formal groupy

because I I've always I've always I've

always gravitated toward comedy and

standup and comedians and and and I go,

you know, Robin Williams was one of my

dearest closest friends of my whole

life. and Albert Brooks and I sort of

started out together and so that sort of

but I'm not the funny guy. I I'm a good

audience for all of you. I'm I'm I'm

your best audience.

>> Well, you're here today to talk about

Coleman Domingo and um he's a new friend

of mine. I I actually met him on on a

dance floor, which I want to talk about

because we were kind of we met just like

at a party.

>> Makes sense. It so makes sense.

>> But when did you first meet Coleman?

Where did you guys first meet? I was

going to make a movie about Ira and

George Gershwin and I was going to make

a movie about the process of writing and

staging

uh Porgi and Bess

>> and um I I had a script and I was

excited and I was casting it and I was

looking for um Todd Duncan who played

Porgi

and I met a lot of actors and when

Coleman came in to the meeting. That was

the first time I I I became certain

first time I met Coleman, but um I

intended after that meeting to cast him

as Todd Duncan.

>> Oh wow. I mean, Stephen, people must

come in to meet with you and you must

feel their nerves. So, how do you get

people to relax when they're having a

meeting with you? Well, well, you know,

it's it it you know, a disadvantage is

me if somebody comes in and I can't find

them in a 15, 20 or 30 minute meeting

because of of of of whatever

expectations they bring to the meeting.

How how nervous some of them are. Some

of them aren't nervous at all, but a lot

of them are. And I had this problem only

because of success because success

creates a a kind of false front. It's

kind of like,

you know, I've always seen myself early

in my career being successful but also

feeling a little bit like a a fake

western street on a Hollywood backlot

where you walk around behind the facade

and there's just a bunch of 2x4s holding

up the facade and people if people only

knew how nervous I am and how nervous

stressed I get they wouldn't be so

nervous in front of me and I really was

and I just I came up with a method which

I used for a couple of pictures starting

with Raiders of the Lost Ark and I

decided that all the actors that I

auditioned and in person I'm going to

meet them in a kitchen and we're going

to cook. We're going to we're going to

actually cook and and and so for a

couple of movies starting with Raiders,

everybody that came in met me in a

kitchen and we were cooking stuff and

that's that was how everybody relaxed

around good food.

>> That's so smart because you're also

you're just getting to do something like

it's like what do I do with my hands

basically is what you're thinking half

the time when you're stressed.

>> Yeah. Everybody becomes so real when

they're covered they're covered in flour

and you know and there's and and you're

trying to break an egg and the egg

spills out on the counter. I mean

everybody becomes their the the best

version of themselves.

>> Although although there must have been

people like good news you have an

audition. Bad news you need to learn how

to cook in a week.

>> Well the good news is you're going to be

part of a recipe but the bad news is

you're only here for 30 minutes and

you're not going to be able to eat what

we make. Yeah.

>> So all the actors that came into the end

of the day were able to actually feast

on what we had prepared starting at 9:00

in the morning. Right.

>> So you meet Coleman and now you you you

guys are and did you work together on

any other fe films after that? What

happened was I was I had actually cast a

lot of the movie and then I had a

something that doesn't often happen when

I'm that far down the line, but I had a

kind of second thought about the project

and I decided not to continue making it.

That's the only reason Coleman and I

didn't work together then. But

remembering Coleman as well as I did, I

cast him in Lincoln playing Private

Green.

>> Right.

>> And that was the first time we actually

professionally worked together.

>> And what is it like working with him?

>> Kind of like riding in a whimo where you

don't have to do anything but sit in the

back seat

cuz the car drives very well by itself.

And Coleman is when he graces your set,

he brings kindness and he brings

collaboration

and he brings love and he brings a real

sense of let's have fun while we're

working hard. While we're working hard

to be serious, can we also have fun?

And he makes a director look forward to

going to work the next morning.

>> Oh, what a dream. I mean, I I'm sure

you're at the point in your life and

career, too, where you can tell like

>> sometimes, you know, people people are

motivated by a lot of things, as you

know, as a director and you have to kind

of find out what motivates them, but

when someone has talent and ease.

>> Yeah,

>> it's not always the case.

>> No, it's not always the case. I've been

lucky. I've had actors I've had a lot of

actors who have been such great

collaborators, you know, to work with

even on really, you know, trying films,

projects.

>> But Coleman isn't about himself. He's

about the whole,

>> you know, he's he's about it's like the

play is the thing, a Shakespeare said,

he's about the play. He's about the

whole. He's he's as interested in the

actors. He's playing opposite

even more so than he is about his own

role in the in in in the whole and and

and that's rare. That's really really

rare. He he is so full of empathy and

because my movie deals disclosure day,

you know, deals a lot with the

importance of empathy.

Coleman was a very easy choice for me to

make to invite him to be part of this

company and the part of this ensemble.

>> We cannot wait for this movie. Another

hit, Stephen. Huge.

>> Knock him. I wouldn't hit.

>> Listen, I'm calling it right now. Okay.

Now, I don't believe in jinxes and I

call it as I see it. And I'm telling you

something. This movie is Everybody is

ready for this movie. It looks so good.

I still don't really know what it's

about, which is great. I think it has to

do with aliens, but you tell me. I don't

know.

>> Well, what what can I say? Here's

looking at you. Here's looking at you,

KID.

UM, do you have a question um for me

that I could ask him, big or small?

>> I've been thinking about that. I you

know he's he's such a success and he's

so consistently successful. I I'd love

you to ask him was there ever a film he

auditioned for that he didn't get and he

was desperate to get.

>> Oo. Oh yeah. I mean he I bet he has an

answer to that because I know that he I

mean when I look at his career he's

really done a ton of different types of

work. I mean Coleman talk about talk

about empathy. He can play he has a huge

range. He can play like a just a

lovebomb of a person and he can play a

really sinister

um scary person, too.

>> Yes.

>> Okay, that's a good one. Well, Stephen,

thank you so much for your time. It

really means a lot. Um I know Coleman

will be thrilled that we talked and I

can't wait to talk to him about what

it's like to work with you.

>> I can't wait. I can't wait to watch

this.

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Oh my god. Coleman Domingo is here and

HE BROUGHT ME HOME.

>> I BOUGHT you a meal. I bought you a I

bought you an egg.

>> Okay, now I've been starting to get

gifts, which is

>> that's

when it becomes ridiculous, right? When

someone finds out what you

>> like something, but

>> Okay, let's discuss this for the

listeners. What did you bring me?

>> I bought you a fake egg.

>> This is a cute It's a keychain. Look at

that.

>> Okay. Um I'm going to describe this

while I show it. It is a fried egg on a

keychain.

>> Yes. Do you like fried eggs?

>> I love fried eggs.

>> Oh, good. Me, too.

>> Sunny side up.

>> I love a sunny side up because it gets

things moving. That's why.

Not to start off there and just go to my

bottom. I guess that's

>> Let me ask you about your sunny side up.

Do you like to cuz this yolk is very

exposed. Do you like to flip it once and

get like

>> I like a I like that. And a little

crunch. Me too. A little crunch.

>> Exactly. And then like So you get then

it bursts with a little hot sauce on

there.

This is a pla a rubber snake egg. Also,

Coleman brought me um um plastic

silverware in case I wanted to pretend

to eat it. I'm not A CRAZY PERSON,

COLEMAN.

>> I KNOW THIS IS FAKE.

>> OKAY.

>> OH MY GO OKAY. WELL, now this is now

going to get ridiculous.

>> Well, I don't want to brag, but we got a

couple A-list stuff up here. We got some

pea pods from Jennifer Lawrence.

>> We have

>> Where did the raspberries come from?

>> Oh, the raspberries. Where did they come

from? Oh, Momma. The Momma sent us fake

raspberries. Mama's very

>> Let's put it next to Momma's

raspberries.

>> I think that's good. Raspberries and

eggs. And there's an egg here. There's

another egg there. Look at that. Look at

that. Oh my god. Okay, that's too cute.

OH MY GOD. I MADE the board. It's so

good. This is already a good hang. A

good hang with Amy.

>> You know, gave a garden gave us that

giant chicken.

>> THAT'S THAT'S ACTUALLY REALLY A REALLY

good chicken.

>> It's really good. I'm really fascinated

by all of this.

>> I know. Isn't it cool? It's very

satisfying.

>> It's good.

>> And I

>> When did When did Now you didn't know I

was going to interview. When did the

fetish start?

>> Tell us about your childhood.

>> Yes.

>> I don't know, but it's like good. It's

like good art. I don't know how to

explain what I like, but I know it when

I see it.

>> Yeah.

>> I love that egg.

>> You

>> that you brought me.

>> You're very welcome.

>> It's because it's realistic. I don't

like children's fake food. I'm an adult.

>> Grown people's fake food. Exactly. What

are you? You're not nuts.

It's so good. It's

>> Coleman Domingo is here. I was really

thinking about what to wear cuz I knew

you'd look incredible.

>> I look good. I'm fine. I'm wearing a

lime green sweater situation.

>> You can wear anything.

>> Really?

>> You look incredible in everything. You

have the best style.

>> Thank you.

>> And it like the the style is is bigger

than just clothes. like you have a you

have a a way of moving through the world

where you like I I find clothes and

fashion to be kind of confusing for me.

Like I'm always trying to figure it out

or I don't always feel like it's a world

that I understand or that I'm a part of.

But whenever I see you wearing whatever

you're wearing, it's like an invitation.

>> I think it is. I I think literally

that's what I think it is. It's like,

okay, I even like what I was supposed to

wear. There was a jacket with this and I

thought, "Oh, no. I'm going to go hang

with Amy. She's a show gun. I got to

shoot the guns. I got to sex it up a

little bit." No, I shouldn't.

>> That's what I emailed you. I was like,

"Bring the guns. Bring it. You got to

bring it.

>> Bring that sex." Okay. So, I'm doing

what I'm supposed to do.

>> So, I But I thought like I just want to

feel relaxed with you. The jacket was

just all like, you know, button up. It's

very serious business meeting with you,

but I was like, "No, I want to feel a

little sexy." That's but it's that's

exactly the point like the clothes never

wear you like you always how do I get

into this feeling right this character

>> and that is what I have learned about

about wearing something like figuring

out how to dress is like basically how

do you want to feel

>> what what do you consider your style to

be when you wear a suit I can always

tell you look so sexy and beautiful and

yourself

>> God bless you

>> exactly you didn't know that this was

going to happen today did you

>> I mean I hoped

I hoped

>> no But you do cuz also I can tell that

you feel very comfortable in your body

and it's comfort you listen Diane Katon

did that. Diane Katon was like

>> she perfected her style in a way that

was just her own and she was always cool

and chic and it was had these masculine

vibes to it and that was her.

>> Who are you wearing?

>> Uh oh. Paul Smith today.

>> Paul Smith.

>> Heard of him?

>> YEAH.

>> OKAY. We got we're kind of new friends.

We're getting to know each other and I

feel like I was trying to remember when

we first met and I think we first really

met

>> um non-verbally on a dance floor.

>> That's exa You do remember that? That's

exact. It was at a night before party

the Emmy night before parties and we

just I don't know the DJ was killing it

that night and you and I you were

wearing a suit actually.

>> Who?

>> You're wearing a suit and you and I we

just cut it up and I was like oh my god

Amy Puller can dance her ass off.

>> Oh my god. Thank you for saying that

right back at you. I mean,

>> we were killing it.

>> Why do you love to dance? I always love

to ask people who love to dance why they

love to dance.

>> You know, I grew up I think my parents

used to always throw the best parties.

So, New Year's Eve was always at our

house and we didn't have We lived in a

row home in Philadelphia and so the

basement

>> we had a bar down there.

>> We had a basement those dark dank

basement.

>> Were your poles carpeted?

>> Oh, absolutely carpeted. We had a black

Sheba, a velvet on the wall like you

know she's like some black woman with an

afro and a tits out and a and a panther

and I would always look at it and just

confused like

>> remember like string art?

>> Yes, absolutely. All of that was down

there. So everything was down there. Our

Christmas toys were in the back but

that's whole other thing. Um but it was

really we would have dance parties down

there. So we go down there and the music

was cranked up and we dance to we just

dance. So my I come from a a family that

loved to dance. My mother before she my

mother passed in 2006. One of the things

that my sister um always loves to tell

me is like just the week before my my

mom was dancing in the aisles of

Pathmark.

>> Oh,

>> she was dancing like you know playing

whatever music was playing. She was

dancing in the aisles. I'm like so idea

that that's my sister's memory of my

mother dancing. So I come from people

who like can dance anywhere. Like I have

zero shame.

>> Me too. And in fact, you know, I get it.

It actually helps me expel a lot of my

social anxiety.

>> Like I'd rather dance than talk. Yes.

Same here. We danced like Do you

remember that show Dancing on Air?

>> Oh, well, we had dance. Well, you're

from Philly Dancing on Air was

>> the one or Dance USA.

>> Dance USA.

>> Yeah, exactly.

>> With uh Kelly Ripa.

>> With Kelly Ripa. Exactly. Exactly.

Exactly. But like you and I dance like

from that generation of

>> We're the same age.

>> Same age. So like when you cut, you tear

it down.

>> 100%. We really move and it's like

>> cuz they don't move like that anymore.

We move like we were trying to hurt

somebody.

>> There's a whole thing a trend on Tik Tok

about how like showing the difference

between how Gen X and Jenz dance because

Jenz barely moves.

>> They barely move

>> and Gen X like clear the dance floor.

>> Oh, we we

>> did you have high school dances and what

was playing? What music was playing at

those?

>> Listen, they had high school dancers. I

went to high school with Will Smith, by

the way. They had high school dances,

but I was

>> You went to high school with Will Smith?

>> Will Smith.

>> Incredible.

>> Same grade. Uh he was one right above

me.

>> Oh my god. What was he like in high

school?

>> You know, he was he was a cool kid. He

was actually a cool kid. He was actually

very friendly and like everybody really

liked him and he would perform at the

wind ballroom in Philadelphia. He and

Jazzy Jeff. But I was a bonafide nerd. I

didn't do any of that stuff. No, no, no.

I didn't come I didn't turn into this

until like second year of college

>> cuz I decided I didn't want to be like

that anymore. I was very shy and bookish

and very awkward.

>> So you weren't like tearing up the dance

floor in high school?

>> No. No. No. No. was dancing at home with

my siblings. But in high school, I

didn't go to any dances. I know. This is

where it gets sad.

I didn't go to any dances. I didn't I

went to my prom, but I got there late

because my um prom date, Terry Hayes,

was very late getting her dress made, so

we got there very late, so I didn't even

dance at my prom.

>> Okay. Okay. This has gotten very tragic,

very

>> No. Well, because I feel like I feel

like that this idea of um coming into

your own and like feeling your p getting

into your sense of power and like who

you are and all this stuff is like the

the theme of the for me your career,

your life, your interview because I find

your my experience with you. I feel like

you really have worked very hard to know

who you are and to like show that person

to the world basically. I mean I think

listen that started I think one of my

first jobs was at Barnes & Noble

bookstore

>> in Philadelphia and I would take care of

the self-help section. This when I was

18 years old self-help and travel that

those were the sections I took care of

and I would be in the corners and I

would be reading these books on how to

become a person to be very honest cuz I

felt I was awkward. I wasn't I wasn't

gregarious or anything but I knew I

wanted to become something else. And so

I went to self-help books and I was

like, "Oh, to become a different person,

you had to do certain things or adopt

certain traits." And I think while I was

becoming an actor as well, it was very

useful. So I was actually trying on

these different things in the way I

dress, the way I express myself, the way

I walk into a room, the way I spoke, you

know what I mean? Where where I pitch my

voice, all of that stuff. So I feel like

all of this was

>> has been a bit manufactured, you know,

because because I didn't have I was

>> I didn't have it before. Well, you know,

you you've talked so much about your mom

who seems so amazing.

>> No, you would have love her. I bet. And

what would she tell you in those little

awkward times? Like, what would she how

would she reassure you or or just like

gently kind of walk by, you know,

alongside you while you were feeling

awkward?

>> What would she say?

>> I'll tell I'll tell you this. I have

Well, I have to tell you a story now

because of that because you just made me

think of this. Um when I was a kid, I

used to always suffer from like really

terrible asthma

>> and um and I one time I was hospitalized

>> and it was right and I went in right

before maybe about like November 1st or

something like that

>> and I was in the hospital and you know

just breathing and stuff like that

getting myself together and then uh when

I came out when I was healthier I came

out and they picked my mom picked me up

at night

>> and we're driving through the city and

there's all these lights up all the

Christmas lights and stuff like that

everywhere. And she said, and I said,

"Oh my god, look at all the lights." She

says, "You know, they all put up their

lights to welcome you back home."

>> Oh, come on.

>> And so this this is the mother that I

had. She would make me believe that I

was very special and that the world was

set up to do me more good than harm.

Constantly. She was constantly going

against any narrative of what the world

was and telling me that I was special,

that I was useful, that I can be

whatever I wanted, I can travel. Cuz I

was always I always had my head in the

book. I was looking at images of ancient

Egypt and Rome and she said when you

could grow up you can go to those places

go to so I always had a a huge

imagination because of my mother

>> and she so so it was in all those

moments when she was just like when I

was wasn't feeling great about myself or

anything she would tell me how smart I

was.

>> Yes.

>> Um

>> that was the thing she always told me I

was smart.

>> Yeah.

>> She always said you're you're so smart

and you're so handsome. that kind of

early

conditioning. It's It makes I mean I'm

saying the obvious, but it's like a it's

like actually a priv I'm learning more

and more it's a privilege to have had

>> a parent or parents that said that to

you.

>> Yeah.

>> Cuz it's

>> Was your parents like that as well?

>> Absolutely. Where they would be like

>> you can do that whisper of you can do

what you want to do. You're smart.

You're capable. You're useful. You're

you're you you um you're you're you uh

>> you have purpose. You have

>> Yes. Exactly. There's a reason why

you're here. All that stuff. Like when

it's said out loud,

>> it changes the course of your life.

>> I think it does. I think I've I've g

I've been given so many beautiful

moments by people throughout my life who

told me something that I didn't maybe I

didn't see in myself. Like even how I

became an actor. One of my early college

teachers. I took an acting class just as

an elective to

>> again my mother said take a class for

fun. take something to get you outside

of yourself. And so we thought about an

acting class and I took this class and

then this teacher Chris Wolf,

>> he said to me, first time I ever heard

this from anyone truly.

>> He said, "Have you ever thought about

acting as a profession?" I was like, "I

don't even know what that is." Like I

don't know how I'm in a kid in West

Philly. I don't know.

>> What were your What were your parents

jobs?

>> No, my my mom was My mom worked at a

bank for for a long time. She cleaned

houses and then she kept going back to

school. Eventually, she worked in

customer service at like First

Pennsylvania Bank. Yeah.

>> My dad sanded hardwood floors. He was my

stepfather and he was just a blueco

collar work I would work with him on the

summers

>> and make some extra money.

>> So they were very much like just like

just good workingass folks and they

wanted you to go to college and do

better than them and you know so they

were just like at least trying to

prepare you for things. But I'd never

heard

>> until I got to college that someone said

>> I would be curious if you follow this

path as an actor. He said, "Because I

think you have a gift." And for I

realized that I'd never heard someone

tell me I had a gift at something,

>> right?

>> And so suddenly I was like, "Gift?" And

he said, "I'd in." He said this, it was

like a challenge. He said, "I'd be very

curious if you followed that path."

>> That was like mic drop.

>> I mean, because we I mean, I don't I

want to get into this this early, but

Coleman and I are both anagram eights.

>> Yeah, we are. Yeah, we are. Yeah. Yeah.

Exactly. We love a challenge. We we got

that from Tina Fay was like, "What?"

>> Tina made Tina made Coleman take the

test on the set of The Four Seasons.

>> He got an eight. I was thrilled.

>> Um

>> and and please explain that again. What

what the eight means?

>> Oh god, my audience is going to be like,

"BUT WE'RE THE CHALLENGER.

>> WE'RE I guess the point is he challenged

you. I'd be so curious what you do with

that gift." And that is a motivating

factor for us is like a little bit of a

challenge is exciting for us. Sometimes

it's like our way through like we like a

little challenge. I mean, we're so easy.

Everyone Everybody has their ways that

like we think we're not manipulated, but

we respond well to when someone says, "I

bet you can't do that."

>> We're like, "I BET I CAN DO THAT."

>> YES, IT'S TRUE.

>> It's true. I'm the same way. When

someone's like, "Maybe maybe that's not

for you." I'm like, "No, it's 100% for

me for the rest of my life."

>> Oh my god. Where are you from?

>> From Boston. And I'm right I'm right

around the corner right corner from

Phillact like

>> but see it's a city from of underdogs as

well. Like like Tina and I we always

talk about that. We're like it's

something that that Philly and it's us

like Yeah. You don't see

>> Philly makes Boston look like London,

England.

>> TINA AND I TINA AND I ALWAYS TALK ABOUT

IT.

>> It's true. It's true.

>> Philly is wild.

>> It's wild. I mean look at our mascots. I

mean just like I mean they're Philly

fanatic. I mean that's insane. I don't

still don't even know what that is.

>> It's an insane person who's

>> We have the Mummers parade. We have the

Mummers is like just drunk Irish people

on New Year's Day.

>> The only time I've ever been called a

C-word to my face is at the Philadelphia

airport.

>> Wait, what?

>> When Tina and I were when Tina and I

were touring and we wouldn't give a guy

um uh one of the weird like, you know,

autograph people there when they follow

you around the airport. It gets really

stressful and we were like, "Oh, you're

stressing us out a little bit." And um

and then he he flung the seabboard and

Tina turned to me and she goes, "Welcome

to Philly."

>> AND I was like, "Yes."

>> It was like a badge of honor though.

You're like, "Yeah, exactly.

>> They like me here."

>> But I want to but but you getting out of

Philly, you go to San Francisco. But but

I just want to stay with one thing that

I love, Coleman, about you is like also

there's like these um there's uh shy kid

trying to find his way. Mom who told him

he was special and the Christmas lights

were for him. You go from Philly to San

Fran. Why San Fran? Why do you move

there?

>> Because uh I had a couple college

buddies. It always happens. This is

usually the story. I have a couple

college buddies, actually three of them

that were living in a studio apartment

in the Tenderloin district. They were

like, "School is amazing." I was

struggling in school. I was working two

jobs and trying to metriculate. And I

was like, my mom was like, "You know,

you can take a semester off and you can

always go back to school." And so I had

these friends of mine that moved out to

San Francisco. They're like, "Come out."

I was like, "Great." Like literally come

out cuz I was also That's another

sidebar. I

>> just made my own joke. I was going to

come out when I was in San Francisco.

>> Come out AND ALSO

>> JUST COME OUT EVERYWHERE.

>> SURE. GREAT. So then I moved to San

Francisco and it was four guys living in

a studio apartment in the Tenderline

district. And if anyone out there

doesn't know the Tenderloin District,

you know,

>> tell everybody about that. you know,

ladies of the night and you know.

>> Yeah, it was a really wild especially

very exciting but '9s that that's when

it was like crisp.

>> Yeah.

>> What was your rent? Do you remember the

how much your rent was?

>> Oh, I do remember my It was

>> for that studio was 625.

>> 625 split four ways. And we're just like

there like exact and I literally slept

this was also a terrible joke but I

literally slept in a closet

>> and every morning you'd come out OF THE

CLOSET

>> BECAUSE THAT WAS WE HAD A walk-in closet

and so I was the third guy fourth guy

moving in there and I literally slept in

a in a walk-in closet

>> and you're too tall. I mean for people

that don't know or can't or haven't been

next to had the pleasure of being next

to you. You're 6'2.

>> 6'2. That's right. Congrats.

>> Tall drink of water. That

>> all these teeny tiny actors. There's a

lot of actors.

>> There's a lot of little actors. Yeah,

there are. And and I and you know

>> I kind of get it because like you know

it's it it but I love being in in a

scene with the 62 gentlemen.

>> It's kind of hot, right?

>> Also, it's just a great view. Like it's

a great angle. Like when we turn around,

the camera's going to be up here. Um

okay, so you go to San Fran, you're

there. You're working as a bartender.

You're writing plays.

>> Do you remember the first play that you

wrote? What was it about?

>> The first play I wrote was called Up

Jump Springtime. And that is the title

of a Stan gets an Abby Lincoln song.

>> And it goes, uh, I was out prominating

and high hopes were fading that dreams

ever really come true. Then up jumped

Springtime,

I got a look at you. And it was a play

that I I wrote. I adapted a bit of a

novel and I sort of embedded my work in

there as well. It really was about

coming of age as a young queer manh. M

>> um and I and I had three actors. We play

all the roles.

>> Um we played men, women, lovers,

mothers, father, sisters, whatever. But

it was really about the experience that

nobody was writing about at the time.

>> It must have felt so good to be a

successful playwright while you were

also auditioning and being an actor.

>> I think so. But to be honest, I didn't

consider myself a I considered myself a

writer at that time and then I grew into

becoming a playwright.

>> What year was this that you're writing?

What year

>> writing? I started writing about 1997.

The last play. I've written plays and

musicals. I've written the Donna Summer

musical on Broadway. I wrote a musical.

>> You wrote You wrote the book for the

Donna Summer musical.

>> Yeah, I know, right?

>> I mean, again, in that in that high

school world of like the dances we were

at or we weren't at,

>> Donna Summer,

her music was so important to our

generation and to every generation. But

I feel like Donna Summer doesn't quite

get spoken about.

>> She doesn't. She was one of the greatest

singers I think that has ever walked

this planet because also her voice, she

could do anything with her voice.

>> Yeah.

>> Um she could sing opera, she could sing

country, she could sing, you know,

disco. I think that her voice, I mean,

she even famously talked about her

voice. She say, "No, I make music and

you just never know where I'm going to

be angled in that way."

>> And then before we move on to you like

the the career stuff, I just want to

pause to talk about because is it around

this time that you meet your husband?

>> Oh, no. I met my husband in 21 years

ago. So in 2005 I

>> Okay. So a little So not in San You met

him in

>> No. Funny. It's a weird thing because I

lived in San Francisco for 10 years,

moved to New York. I go back to San

Francisco to do a show at Berkeley Rep.

>> Yeah.

>> I go to Berkeley, California. I'm

crossing paths going into a Walgreens

with the most beautiful person I think

I've ever seen.

>> Not even just beautiful aesthetically,

but like just energetically. We never

speak. Three days later, I'm trying to

buy a used computer on Craigslist. I

couldn't stop thinking about him and I

thought about posting one of the

Craigslist misconnections ads.

>> Oh, it's so analog.

>> It's so analog, right? I used to read

them like crazy. And I get to the second

page

>> and third one down. I remember exactly

the placement and it said, "Saw you

outside of Walgreens Berkeley." He

placed it just an hour before I looked.

So, we were looking for each other. And

then we met and I'm so uncool. We met 3

days later, had our first date, and I

literally was like, I think I love you,

and you're going to change my life.

That's how uncool I am, though.

>> But that's so good. That's so direct.

Also, everyone that took a look at Raul,

like everyone would be like, I love you.

>> Maybe you got that a lot. Like, I love

you.

>> I get it. You got to lock that down

really fast.

>> Yeah, that was like, but that's you like

you're I mean, what I'm learning about

you, you're in the moment. And also

you're the one of the many many things

that I love about getting to know you is

you

there's not a lot of like like you

people know how you feel.

>> Yeah. There's no question.

>> That's a but that's a love language.

Like I'm going to just tell you how I

feel now. I'm going to take that risk.

I'm like that's that's what

vulnerability is. Like I'm just going to

tell you right now I love you. Like

that's amazing.

>> And like no games at all. And I'm always

telling people too like don't play any

games. Me too. Just be straight up. Just

be straight. If you don't like it, you

don't like me or whatever. Just tell me.

move then that that that takes time away

from you know just move away get out the

way then cuz the people who will receive

that they're going to be right there

with me

>> and so you guys have been together 22

years 21 years you know here at Good

hang we only allow a few um

>> a few spouses

>> to come um because you know you don't

want to have you don't want to have

everybody's wife and husband around and

we've had the most amazing group of

people we've had Raul's here today

>> yeah he is

>> we've got he's in the green room hi Hi,

Ro.

>> Hey. Hey. Hi.

>> I love you. Um, Ro is here today. We had

Carol Brunette bring her husband, Brian.

And we've had Viola Davis's husband,

Julius.

>> Oh, that's great.

>> And that's it.

>> That's it. That's it for the good hang.

That's it.

>> That's it. No more spouses. No.

>> Well, R's like a cat. He's sort of like,

you know.

>> Yeah.

>> You You barely even know he's here.

>> Well, and and the cheekbones.

>> The what?

>> We bought him for the cheekbones.

>> I mean, both of you guys are like

cheekbone city. You guys could open up a

cheekbone shot.

That's our next adventure. Exactly. And

it's funny cuz sometimes when we're with

other people, they can't even tell that

we're it's I guess it's a compliment.

They can't tell that we've been together

for so long.

>> Yes.

>> And they can't tell that they can't tell

cuz we're still like very in love with

each other. Yes.

>> And we have fun and we're touchyfey, but

also then

>> even when we're in groups of people,

they're like, "Oh my god, how do you

guys know each other?" Oh, that's my

husband. They're like, "Oh my gosh,

that's my bro but that's also my

husband. He's like a lot of fun." Yeah.

And I wish you two could have children

together. And

>> I know just but just the two of you.

>> We'll wait for the science to happen.

Many things can happen.

>> Faces alone.

>> You just want those cheekbones on baby.

>> Cheekbones on that baby. Maybe we have

four cheekbones.

>> When I've been looking at your career,

which you've done so many things, so

many different parts all over the

spectrum. Like Coleman, you just you

play really intense like kind of joyous

lovebomb characters. You play deeply

complicated and oftenimes scary and

terrifying characters. You can do it

all. You You've done so many different

parts. But what I love is your path is

is the one that I recognize because

we're the same age of like what all

actors kind of did to start because you

didn't have

>> an in. you were just like, "How do I get

started making the work?" And so you do

you're like learning on the job and I

mean you're even in Law and Order which

like YOU'RE NOT AN ACTOR IF YOU WERE IN

LAW AND ORDER.

>> EXACTLY. EXACTLY.

>> What What you were on Do what did you

play? Do you remember your character?

>> I was on like I'd love to ask

>> three or four Law and Orders. I was on

different characters.

>> Yeah. Yeah. Exact Criminal Intent,

>> of course.

>> And I played a schizophrenic heroin

addict.

>> Okay.

>> I played an attorney. I played an

attorney on one of them with Dennis

Bukater.

>> You went from the uh schizophrenic

heroin addict to an attorney.

>> Yeah, exactly. That's acting.

>> Now that's acting. I I also was a a

bartender at a at a leather uh at a gay

leather bar.

>> Great. Exactly.

>> Like um like unpacking the various ball

gags as you were telling them about.

>> EXACTLY. CUZ YOU KNOW WHAT I love about

Loner is that they're so busy. They're

so busy when the cops are talking to

them. Like they're just like New Yorkers

didn't have time for anybody. They're

like, "I'm sorry. I got to pack these

bags while you're talking to me.

Officer, what?

>> I got to get the fruit off this truck. I

don't have time for that dead girl. It's

incredible.

>> I love watching in particular for that.

I'm like the walk and talk. We're too

busy for these officers to talk to us. I

love it.

>> Totally.

>> So, I was a very busy bartender. Yes,

exactly.

>> And was exciting to get those parts at

the time. That was amazing.

>> Because if you didn't get Law and Order,

you felt like you were garbage. You were

like,

>> I've never gotten Law and Order. And I

was my dream. If I could go back in the

time machine, if I could back to the

future of my life, the one thing I WOULD

DO DIFFERENTLY AND MAYBE IT WOULD CHANGE

my whole maybe would book a law and

order.

>> I would book a law and order.

>> I would.

>> That was my goal. But listen, when I

lived in San Francisco, the gig was to

get booked on Nash Bridges cuz that was

that was Yeah. I played every dumb

criminal on that show. I played one of

them. Exactly. And Yes. And I I

literally Wait, there's one episode and

people can watch it. It's my favorite

episode of me. Um, I kidnapped Don

Johnson's daughter and then he found me

and I happened to be wearing a coogie

sweater while I was working out.

>> Okay, sure.

>> I was wearing, you know, that Bill Cosby

coogie sweater. I was wearing a coogie

sweater like while I was working and he

and he busts through the door and I'm

like, "Oh, and I throw the weights off

and I'm running." Then he kicks me in

the ass through the window and he picks

me up. He slaps me around. He's like,

"Where is she wearing?" I'm like, it's

my favorite episode. It's so crazy and

rabid and you're like, "What is

happening? You're wearing

>> a coogie sweater while I'm working out.

I'm bench pressing. I have a I was like,

but also I was a young actress, so I

didn't question it. I'm like, yeah, you

guys know more than I do. That's what

we're wearing.

>> At the time, I didn't work out, so I

don't know. I thought people worked on

coogie sweaters.

>> Acting is so embarrassing. I love it so

much. I love it. Okay, then you go to

New York. You're doing a million plays

on Broadway and the West End. And I do

have some important theater questions

because I I'm have such respect for

people who do that grind. It is such a

grind. It is the hardest job. I mean

>> to have the hardest part of your day be

at the end of your day to have to show

up every day and do the same thing and

you're not getting paid a lot of money

when you're doing theater and you are,

you know, you're like being asked to do

a lot. But I I'm always curious about a

couple things. I'm like, OK Coleman will

tell me the truth. Okay. Okay.

>> Yeah. Have you ever thrown up on stage?

>> No.

>> Okay.

>> No, I haven't.

>> Because these are some of my stage

fears, like my anxieties. Have you What

do you do if you have to in the middle

of a scene go to the bathroom?

>> You just You just hold it.

>> You You hold it. You You hold it.

Although I did There was a situation

>> where your character went the bathroom.

>> You said you you know what? Listen, I

like I make sure before I go out. It's

It's a practice. You have to go You have

to make that happen.

>> Yes.

>> Whatever. Number one. Number two, it's

got to happen right now.

>> You got to have a a egg over easy. You

got to make

>> You got to make it happen.

>> You got to make it happen. Have you ever

forgotten lines on stage?

>> No. But no, but I've I've had to work

with some people who sometimes would

flub some things and you'd have to you

have to help support it, make it

>> biggest nightmare, which is like someone

skips ahead.

>> Oh yeah.

>> WHEN YOU'RE IN A

>> OH, I FULLY have that. And they skip

ahead. Oh, wait. Exactly. That's a whole

living stress dream.

>> Yeah. Exactly. Oh, no. It's true and it

happens. But that's but I think that's

the joy of it too for sure.

>> So So you're like you got that makes you

wily and you're like I got to work on my

feet. I got to get that story line back

in there. I got to make that queue

happen.

>> I love it. Such a challenger. Um have

you ever forgotten a prop? Like been

like gone in a scene to

>> Oh yeah, I forgot props.

>> And you reach in your pocket for I think

I forgot a gun.

>> I for I forgot a gun. And I was like

>> And you were like

>> I just I'd hold it like this. I was

really strong. They were looking at me

like where's the gun? And I'm like, it's

right here.

Tough.

>> You didn't just point your finger.

>> I didn't point the finger. I I I I was

smart enough to not do that. So, but I

just was strong

>> and I was a threat.

>> But there was no gun. Exactly.

>> Um, have you ever had to say, "Is there

a doctor in the house?"

>> No, but but somebody said that on my

flight the other day and I was like,

>> they did?

>> And I literally thought, well, I played

a doctor before and I thought I thought

that's not what they want.

They're like, "I'm sorry. If someone

needs a medical emergency, is there a

doctor on board?" And I was like,

literally for a second, I thought,

"What?" I literally thought I was a

doctor for a second. Cuz I played Swear

to God. I really thought about I can't

do anything. I weren't getting anything.

>> When did you play a doctor?

>> I played a doctor on the neck.

>> Oh yeah, that show was great.

>> Exactly. Yeah. I mean it must be to be a

doctor and when you hear this this is

why you know you're not a doctor because

when you hear is there a doctor on board

and you're like oo but a real a regular

doctor must be like oh god

>> they must be

>> they must be

>> but also you start thinking like doctors

do different things there's not one not

one right so you think like well I have

a doctorate

>> but you really do

have a doctorate I have a doctor I have

you have a doctorate

>> I mean I do not have a doctorate yet I

have a doctorate not to like But but it

it just must be like oh god I can't can

I pretend I'm not a doctor.

>> They're like I'm just watching

>> I just Yeah. I want to finish this

movie. I want to finish this.

>> Yeah. I'm almost done with this season

of Summer House. Like

>> um wait what uh you you have a

doctorate?

>> I do. I just got I just got two in a

month. Isn't that crazy?

>> Oh my god. Congratulations.

>> It's kind of greedy though, too. I think

I just got I got I just got one from

Swathmore College. I got a I'm a doctor

of arts as of

>> four days ago.

>> Fantastic. And I got one from my alma

mater at Temple University. Yeah,

>> that must have been really something.

>> It was really wonderful.

>> Did you you went you went back and like

do you have to give a speech?

>> I gave the commencement address at

Temple and I gave um a little acceptance

and speech at Swathmore. And I think but

what I loved about it I I especially

right now I feel like

>> something about like being with young

people and students and just like I'm

like because I feel like they really

need to hear some words I hear like

how's it going to be and or they need to

be inspired like

>> what what was your kind of what was your

um uh organizing principle for your

temple talk?

>> Um love.

>> Yeah.

>> I really feel like the more that I

distill things of what I care about

right now, what I I inspire people to do

is to love more and whatever that means.

I feel like that that encompasses a lot.

But I feel if I'm talking about love and

service

>> and if people can attach themselves to

that in whatever way it is for them. So

I feel like I'm talking a lot about that

cuz I feel like that's what we need to

hear. I don't want to oh you know make

this world yours and do this and I don't

need to do all that. I said but if you

do it with love whatever you're doing.

>> Yes.

>> Just participate

>> and and feel like that you know you have

a voice and you can you can be the

change. You know there's and don't be

afraid of what's out there. There's

probably jobs out there that aren't even

>> don't even have a name yet that you're

going to create. So, I feel like I just

want to inspire that with their

imagination as well, you know.

>> Well, I mean, the word that I've heard

described

a word that is used to describe you a

lot is empathy is the the empathetic way

in which you not only work with people

because you learn a lot by somebody

>> about somebody by how they work. Yeah.

>> Um, but that is that makes perfect sense

that that's what you would be talking

about because I mean in all the

characters that you've played,

>> you have that even characters that feel

like they're really the villain of the

story,

>> there is you are always approaching them

with that

basically that they're a human being.

>> I think so. I think I have to love every

character that I play and I feel like

even though the villainous ones or like

whether I'm playing a pimp or a Mr. than

the color purple or Joe Jackson. I feel

like

>> I never try to take the lens of what

everyone else says about the person. I

do my my study and my research and I

find out who that person is and find my

way in. Usually that person's connected

to some part of me in some way.

>> You're working Color Purple. You're

working in Michael like the the work

you've done the the work you've done on

stage. Rustin,

>> how did that change? I mean that that

that portrayal was so beautiful and also

just like a part that met you at the

time when you were ready for it. Did it

feel like that?

>> It did. It felt like we were meeting

each other when we needed each other

like like this this role this moment

>> to pull by Rustin out of the

>> for people who don't know

>> by Rustin was the organizer of the March

on Washington. He was an openly gay man

at a time of course when it was

>> not cool to himself or his body or or

him having momentum in this world and he

defied all that and he was brilliant.

Every no one can deny that he was

brilliant and he was smart but he was

always on the sidelines of history

>> and I felt like and I I can

>> maybe I'll say it

>> in this way too. I felt that my career

was very similar in that way. I would

show up I would do the work. I was a

practitioner, but I was always sort of a

bit marginalized and then in in a way

just like, oh yeah, that's great, but

that that serves that purpose,

>> but it's never the engine or something,

but I knew I could be the engine. Yeah.

>> And so when I finally got this

opportunity,

>> it felt like we were meeting each other.

We're like, "Oh, I I know this guy. I I

I've lived with him. He's a part of me

as well."

>> And and then also, I just have to talk

to you about Singh.

>> Okay.

>> Coleman.

>> Coleman. I watched that on an airplane.

Mhm.

>> And I love to cry on an airplane.

>> Me, too. Me, too. It's the best thing.

>> I love I I bet we're similar. I like to

cry by myself.

>> Yeah.

>> On an airplane.

>> Yeah.

>> And um hope like like like hopefully

under a blanket.

>> Exactly. Exactly. Yeah.

>> That must have felt like such a work of

talking about love. Like it must have

felt like a What was it like to make

that film?

>> I think that's exactly what it felt

like. I felt like I knew that I

>> I had the opportunity to help tell the

story of these men in a really complex

way.

>> Incarcerated men.

>> Yeah. These men were incarcerated, you

know, with this beautiful arts program

in the center of it

>> and they hung on to it like it was their

um

>> um it was a it was a new path for them.

>> Yeah.

>> To

exhibit empathy and joy and dance and

art and all this other way all this

other stuff. So it was really like

healing them in many ways. And I worked

with a group of formerly incarcerated

men who went through the program and I

really, you know, led this film and we

produced it as well. But I knew it was

something that like, you know, I think I

got paid like $150 a day and we had a

very tight schedule. It looks like a

labor.

>> And this is the kind of work that you're

like, oh, this is why I can do that

other high profile work and I can put my

attention on work like this that's very

necessary. Yeah.

>> And so we created with like we locked

arms together and that's what it felt

like locking arms and it was a great

beautiful challenge for me because I

these men had the lived experience

>> of being incarcerated and going through

this program. And it was the first time

that I think I was challenged with

actually giving even more of myself of

like putting myself in those

circumstances like yeah I could be

wrongfully accused of something. I could

be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

A lot of people in prison are not they

don't belong in prison

>> you know. So I can find that part of

myself. So I think it was a bit more

bearing of my own soul in that work and

I think that's what the the difference

is for me. I I can see it which is why I

feel like I haven't watched the movie

that often because I feel like when I

watch it I feel you know when you watch

something you're like oh it takes you

right back to this.

>> It's basically what I always I have like

a a sematic experience if I'm watching

something I've done much more than

remembering like even the plot or story

or like I just remember the feeling I

had making it.

>> Yeah. And that must have been an intense

feeling.

>> It was pretty intense.

>> Yeah. I mean, it's so you're so good in

it. You're such a natural leader.

>> Um, and you can tell in that film that

you're leading people through the film

while being in the moment in the

characters.

>> Well, the funny thing is I did that

movie after Rustin. Yeah.

>> And I really felt like

>> Were you doing them at the same time

basically?

>> Um, a little bit. A little bit cuz I had

to do the pickups for Rustin right after

and then I started The Color Purple. But

>> oh my god. I literally felt like sort of

that trio of films really ignited that

true leader in me on sets,

>> you know. I feel and and and as a

leading actor too. I sort of

>> I literally moved into my leading actor

days in a way like sort of

>> but I feel like I needed all those years

of supporting and and being sort of that

utilitarian actor and plays and things

like that. I needed all of that and but

I was always even when I was doing work

on stage I was always the equity deputy.

So I was always the one that everyone

came to to make to write the wrongs or

you know advocate for actors or

practices or something like that. So I

was like always the one like saying will

being willing but now I really had the

the role and the opportunity and so then

I took that into my leadership of sing

and and it's just kept going.

>> It's such incredible work. I loved it so

much. I wish we were friends then cuz I

would have texted the [ __ ] out of you.

Um, okay. So, um, as we're wrapping up

and we're going to talk about your new

movie, Disclosure Day, which is going to

be a gigantic hit. Holy [ __ ] And Four

Seasons, which I love you on. Let's get

to the fact that you've worked with and

have been influenced by and shaped by

amazing women.

>> Yes. Truly. your mother being the first

Edith who I just everything I read about

her I just love I love her face and I

love I just she just seems like a

wonderful person and I love the story of

Edith writing letters to Oprah Winfrey

who of course was um a producer and uh

in in the color in the color purple um

version that you did and can you just

tell that story about how your mom wrote

letters when you were

>> Oh my god

get this my mom She would when I was

starting out as an actor in San

Francisco in the '9s,

I would call my mom. We would talk a

couple times a week and you know, I

would have my struggles as an actor and

she's like, she would always say, "Well,

you know, I wrote Oprah today." I was

like, "Why?"

And she said, "Well, you know, she can

help you." I was like, "What's she going

to do?" Well, she, you know, she helps

people. You know, just write a letter.

She can help you. She's the lady that

helps. Yeah. I want you I You're so

good. if Oprah found out how good you

were, she could help you. And I was

like, "Okay, whatever." So anyway, so

I've been like over and over again. This

was like maybe I would say eight times

my mom wrote Oprah. And I was and I was

so frustrated. Oh my god, will you

please stop writing Oprah? I'm like

that's it feels crazy. So anyway,

cut to years later. And I just have to

sidebar say this. mother always she was

like

>> she was so hopeful

>> and she would say

>> oh my gosh I just need I just want Spike

Lee to know you and Stephen Spielberg

and they she

>> they would love you they would just love

you and I I'm about to cry think about

this but she she always had that much

faith that people

>> even if I didn't see it she thought

>> these pe if they just got to know you

they would love you the way I love you

>> yeah that's that's

>> and and literally I'm like as I look at

my life now and all these people are in

my life.

>> Yeah. Amazing.

>> So sometimes so I I do believe that

sometimes people have dreams for you you

don't even have for yourself.

>> And at some point they meet.

>> Yeah.

>> And so I had this moment. I was in Maui

with Oprah walking on her beautiful

mountain.

>> Incredible.

>> And we're hiking and suddenly I said,

"Oh my god, it just occurred to me. I

said, "My mother used to write to you

over and over again."

And she says, "Really?" I said, "Yeah."

and she she sort of stops and she says,

"Oh, I don't know if I got the letters,

but I know I got the message."

And then we just continue to walk hand

in hand. And I I really do believe it's

like I know that like how can I say it?

I think that

I know that like when I lost my mom in

2006 and I lost my mom and my stepfather

in the same year.

>> I just I I knew that like my my friend

Melissa said um when I was very bereff

and I said what am I going to do with

all this love? I know that I was a good

son if I know if I wasn't anything else

I was a good son. And she said well

you're going to put the love into

everything you do.

>> Yeah. Yeah.

>> And and let and that will be you'll do

it in dedication to your mom. And so

literally I feel like because I've been

leading that way,

>> I've been meeting every person. It's

like my my mother's own Wizard of Oz.

I've been meeting every person that she

laid out for me.

>> Yes.

>> And that they've loved me the way that

she loves me.

>> Yes.

>> And so it leads me to like with like

with Disclosure Day, it's like she

wanted me she wanted Steven Spielberg to

know me. She didn't know Steven

Spielberg would love me, but we love

each other now and he's my family,

>> you know.

>> I love that. I love Edith so much.

And when I tell you you

>> and I don't say this lately, you would

love her. She was fun and sweet.

>> Yeah.

>> And like to dance. I think I'm a lot

like her to be honest. And she talked to

everybody. She would she would really

When I was a kid, it was annoying. I was

like, "Mom, can we just go to the in and

out the bank?" And she was like, "HOW

ARE YOU? HOW ARE YOU DOING?" She flirted

with everybody. She was like, "Look at

your legs. You are so cute, Amy. Oh my

god." She would do that.

>> Well, you know what's kind of fun when

you when you're a woman of a certain

age. I just realized it the other day.

And I was like, "Watch it, Amy." AND YOU

GET LIKE you get to the certain age

where you start going, "You're

beautiful.

>> Look at your butt. Wow. He's got nice

arms." And everyone's like, "Oh, that

little old lady IS SO NICE."

>> THAT WAS MY MOTHER.

>> BUT YOU GOT TO BE CAREFUL.

>> YOU GOT TO BE CAREFUL. EXACTLY.

>> BUT YOU just go, "Wow, look at her

face."

>> Most time my mother was old school, so

she would reach out and touch it, too.

She would kill Oh, yeah. My my

grandmother used to be like, "Oh, look

at the chest on him." And I'd be like,

"Nana, you can't touch."

>> So now you're becoming that that

>> I'm becoming that. Good.

>> And how is it like working with my my

wife for life, Tina Fay?

>> We have such a good time together. The

wildest thing is it's funny. When I

first met Tina, I

>> She's shy, too.

>> She's very shy, but I thought

>> I didn't know what to think of her when

I first met cuz I thought she's very

>> I thought she's very She's like a

scientist, especially when it comes to

comedy and being very thoughtful, but

she's also very I find her to be very

tender and very sweet.

>> She's very sweet. She's very sweet and

she's she's she's

>> more touchyfey than I knew. And I I love

that we've sort of become I feel like

she's becoming one of my good friends.

>> Yeah.

>> Cuz I I love

>> Yeah.

>> I text she texts right back. She's

always in my corner.

>> She's just um once I found out she's a

Taurus, too. She's a Taurus.

>> What are you?

>> Sagittarius.

>> Oh,

>> yeah. Taurus. Once she says she I found

out she's a Taurus, I'm like, I got you

figured out. I lived with one for 21

years. So, I got you. Um, she wanted me

to ask you, uh, what peptides are you

on?

>> That's right.

>> I'm not on any I feel like I I feel like

I want to I feel like

>> she's like she's like she's in the

writer room right now and she said ask

Coleman. The writers want to know where

does he get his energy peptides?

>> They all think I'm on something because

they're like, "How are you possibly

doing all this stuff?" But it's just

it's like natural.

>> We got to get pep. I mean, my dream is

that while we're while I'm recording

these podcasts, we're all getting

peptides at the same time. I feel like

what we should because I think pep like

whatever peptides is doing

>> I don't know.

>> People are looking good.

>> You know what I love about peptides is

people are like I'm getting all these

peptides and it's like what's in it and

they're like I don't know.

>> Yes. That's everyone everyone

>> you're just shooting it in and they're

like

>> they're like hope for the best.

>> Hope for the best. I don't know.

>> Okay. You're getting them every day and

it's what's in it. It's called B128.

>> Yeah.

>> But you're right. No one can describe

what it is.

>> No. No one knows what it is.

>> IN FACT, it's better not to know. just

like, let's just go. Let's just peptide

it up.

>> Let's do it. Peptide it up. You and I.

Let's do it. Peptide this [ __ ] up.

>> Um, okay. You're in the big movie of the

summer. It's I mean, let's Stephen

Spielberg.

>> So, we have this thing where we talk to

people before our podcast and we find

out more about them. We talk well behind

their back and we talked to Steven

Spielberg.

>> Oh, you No, you didn't.

>> You did what?

>> Yes, we talked to Steven Spielberg. I

was very nervous.

>> Wow. I actually I realized as I was

talking to him I was like I almost was

like Mr. Spielberg. Um you know um and I

said to him I'm like your your your work

is in in the in my body like your your I

your work is in my subconscious forever.

You've shaped our childhood every single

summer every version of like an unknown

world you brought us into. He's just so

um

>> he's singular.

>> He is what and you've worked with him a

couple of times.

>> Yeah. So before we get to the great

stuff he talked he said about you, what

what what is so great working about

working with him, what's what's it like

to work with him?

>> He he's just lovely.

>> He's funny and warm.

>> He gives you he's got a sparkle in his

eye that make you believe that you can

do anything. Even if he's giving you the

the wildest task of saying these lines

while going through an explosion and

there's, you know, the camera work is

all intensive,

>> he looks at you and believes you can do

it.

>> And so you have that belief. feel like,

"Oh, great. We're going to make

something together. We're taking a leap

of faith together."

>> He's really just lovely and he's kind.

>> Yeah.

>> And he's right there with you. He likes

his um portable monitor and he's right

in the action with you.

>> Not not he's not at um chairs. He's not

at Video Village.

>> No, there's no ego about the work.

>> Yeah.

>> And he's also just like, you know, what

do you think about this? Or like you

can, you know, you can bring your ideas,

oh, let's let's think about that. So,

he's very collaborative. And that's what

I enjoy about him. He's he's it's his

kindness

>> and the way and also he feels like

>> how can I say I he feels like he's just

starting out like he's that he's that

excited he's like oh let's try that

let's I have an idea I have an idea okay

great

>> and he's like okay let's let's try it

>> and so he feels like he it's he's a kid

assembling his favorite craftsman around

and he's playing with you all playing

together you know

>> I mean this is like a big it's this is

going to be a big summer movie like a

blockbuster

>> but also I think it's a movie we all

need right now cuz it is a movie after I

saw it. I've seen it twice now

>> and I've cried both times. That'll just

tell you

>> and I won't tell you why I cried, but it

really did feel like

>> it's a movie that's trying to connect us

again. All of us,

>> you know, especially like the idea of

inviting

the idea that there's we're there's

something bigger than all of us

>> that we're a part of. So, I think that's

what I why I cried. I called him right

after and I said, "You really care about

us. you really care about humanity,

>> you know, and and what we're wrestling

it with right now in our times and then

what can unite us?

>> Well, he said the same thing about you.

He basically was like, "Yeah, let me

tell you." Okay, you know what? Forget

about Stephen. Let me tell you what he

said.

>> What did he say about you? Well, first

of all, he said that no

>> Real Housewives episode.

>> That would be really funny. This is the

first podcast where I'm like, he

actually said SOME SOME [ __ ]

UM he was saying that working with you

is like working with a self-driving car.

Like you know that you're going to like

you have it. You're you're in the zone.

Like there's very little that he has to

do because he has such faith in you. But

what you lead with as a person on set in

an ensemble is empathy and love and

respect. So like what you get is this

act this very skilled actor but also a

really wonderful person. And the I think

the privilege of when you get to a

certain age and you work, you get to

want to surround yourself with those

kind of people. Like that's important.

And it's not always the case. I think

when you're younger, you're kind of like

maybe complicated, difficult people are

there to challenge me in different ways

and I'll learn something from them. And

I know for me anyway, like as I get

older, I'm like

>> also I want to be around people good

people. Like life is short.

>> Yeah, life is short. I mean it should

this should be fun. Um how lucky are we

truly? So, um, and his question was his

question was kind of like a cuz we were

talking about auditioning and I was

asking him like how do how do people not

get nervous around him? Like how does he

deal with people's nerves? Cuz he must

have people coming in being like nice to

meet you.

>> Um, and he wanted me to ask you, did you

ever not get a part that you tried hard

to get? And like what did you what did

you do with it when you like what did

you do with the feeling when you didn't

get it?

>> So many. Oh my god. That was like most

of my career. I was I was booking a lot.

I really I felt like I was like

>> even things you felt like you really

wanted or you really um

>> were skilled for.

>> At some point you had to divorce

yourself from the idea of getting the

role. You're like okay I'm prepared for

this but it's not up to me. It's like

someone cuz and maybe that's the thing I

pride myself on. I'm like when they want

me they want all of me.

>> Yeah.

>> They want it's okay if they want someone

else. So for me, I I it became a

practice of being very sober about it

>> and saying, you know, it's okay if they

didn't want me because like what I give

is very different than that other guy.

>> Yeah.

>> It's not that he was better than me or

both. No, he was useful to them and all

that he was going to bring to it.

>> And that's cool. So for me it was like

and maybe that was a healthy thing that

I needed to give myself. Yeah.

>> So I can give myself grace and like and

and be and continue to be a practitioner

of this art form. Yeah.

>> And not let it be about my ego.

>> But isn't doesn't it feel like it's a

learned skill? That's hard to do

anymore. learn because also when you're

young but also there are times when

you're I mean listen I've had moments

where there were things that I thought I

was perfect for and I didn't get and it

shattered me but like to be I'll be very

honest Amy Amy I'd never really imagined

the place that I'm in right now in this

industry I just wanted to be a working

actor

>> and also you're so famous and successful

TOO

>> I got so famous

>> but you're right and also the

contentment part That's the goal.

>> Yeah.

>> Like satisfaction and contentment. It's

the hardest thing to find. It can, you

know, it doesn't matter what you do.

>> Yeah.

>> Hell is wanting more. It's like hell.

That's suffering, man.

>> It is suffering. I think the Listen, I

got I got a beautiful, beautiful um

message from this guy when I was turning

50. This guy was driving me in a car in

Toronto and he was 70 years old. And I

said, "Do you have any

>> Yeah.

>> any words of wis wisdom for my 50th?"

>> He said, he said, "Listen, I wish I knew

this years ago." He said, "It's

important to

you want to hope for everything but want

for nothing,

>> and I was like

to eliminate want,

>> you know?" So, I know that like I when I

walk into a room, like you say, I walk

into these rooms or in sets, I don't

really want anything.

>> Yeah.

>> I hope that it can be. There's other

things that I hope that it can be,

>> but I'm not coming to get something.

>> Oh, yeah.

>> You know what I mean? I'm coming to

hopefully be in service and to and also

to give something. Yeah.

>> I think that's the best we all can be.

So if everyone's coming from that place,

we all win.

>> Yeah.

>> You know, it's the problem is only when

somebody's coming in just like to want

want to take [ __ ] and that's ego in the

room and then it's a that's some dark

forces and you try to just protect

yourself against that, you know.

>> We got to talk about those egos offline.

Exactly. Those dark forces.

>> Okay. I love that you we're the same

age, by the way, cuz I I've said this

before.

>> We look good, don't we?

>> We look You look great. You look great.

>> Thank you. But we're making 50. Look,

55. We're doing 56. Pretty good. I'm

turning 55 very soon.

>> I'm older than you. I'm 56, right? Yeah.

And And I like What's your favorite part

about your 50s? I love my 50.

>> You know what's funny to me? Lately, it

feels like things are moving faster.

Like I just turned 56, but I'm like I'm

not going to be 57 this year. It doesn't

make any sense.

>> And and I once you get past 55, I don't

like the second half of the decade

>> because because like we like,

>> you know, I'm 55. I just turned 50 and

then you're like and then you start

about to hit 60 something and then

you're like you know what 60 60 61 62 63

64 65

>> I feel like my 50s are my best.

>> Me too.

>> Yeah. I felt my 40s I was it was it was

fine.

>> Yeah. 30s were getting better.

>> It's getting better. Yeah. Agree.

>> But also I feel like we have to you have

to be conscious of you have to take care

of yourself right in a different way.

>> Um show up in a different way for

yourself. Yeah. So I feel like we're

getting better.

>> Yeah. I feel like the our our obsession

with youth is is like I think it's

changing. I think our generation is

helping. I think one of the legacies of

Gen X, I've said this before, is that of

which we are proudly proud members of.

We're not boomers. We are Gen X.

>> We're Gen X. We rock.

>> We don't give a [ __ ]

>> We really don't GIVE A [ __ ] WE'RE the

we don't give a [ __ ] generation.

WE HAD KEY AROUND OUR [ __ ] NECK. WE

GOT WHEN WE WERE EIGHT.

>> EXACTLY. We were like [ __ ] around, find

out generation. Exactly.

>> We were tough. We are tough.

>> We really are. And we and we and nobody

remembers us and nobody gives US ANY

RESPECT.

>> NOBODY GIVES ANY RESPECT. IT'S IT'S

TRUE. We're the toughest generation.

>> WE HAVE A PRESIDENT. THE GEN X

president.

>> Anyway, um but we don't care. We don't

care.

>> The system is broken. We always knew

that.

>> But one of the things about it is like

is that um we've Oh, I've completely

lost MY TRAIN.

>> I'M TOO OLD. I'm too old. I forgot what

I was talking about. Who cares? You know

what? Who cares?

Who cares? Who cares? Okay, last

question.

>> Okay,

>> last question. Coleman, what has been

making you laugh these days? I know you

love to laugh. You love comedy.

>> Yes.

>> What are you listening to, watching like

what do you go to when you want to check

out, laugh, like dumb, highbrow? What is

the thing? always go back to watching

Melissa McCarthy and Spy.

>> Oh my god. Okay, let's watch her right

now. I got a laptop.

>> Spy is my any clip. Spy is I I will

watch it.

>> Melissa McCarthy is so

>> She makes me pee on myself. She's so

funny.

>> Have you guys met?

>> I love her. Yeah, we we we she came to

uh I saw I met her backstage at SNL when

she was there for Jack Black and I just

like

>> she

>> I really I think we're becoming friends

because we exchanged numbers, but I

really want to be your friend. give him

a little credit. What do you think I'm

going to do? Run over there and be like,

"Hey, I'm a crazy lady. Where's the

buffet? I'M FROM THE MIDWEST. WHERE'S

BLUE MAN GROUP?"

>> Lucas here and I need to get close to

him.

>> Yeah. and she's like she comes across as

this mousy woman who works for um the

CIA and then you find out she's an agent

as well and then she goes on this whole

journey like she she was like really

like you know

>> laying back and then she you find out

she's like the most wildest one of them

all.

>> She's wild.

>> Yeah. You like

>> all these great disguises which are

really one is funnier after the ninth

one. Rose Burn is in it. She's out of

control.

>> This is a comfort movie for you.

>> It's a comfort I will watch it at any

time. That and the color purple. I know

it's very weird. I'm very

>> I watch like the whoopy version of it or

this. So, either I want to cry hard

>> or I want to laugh harder.

>> Oh god, I'm with you. I kind of that I'm

the same way. I want to cry. I want You

know what? I don't want to be anymore.

>> Bored.

>> Scared.

>> Don't want to be scared. No.

>> No. I don't want to be scared. I don't

want to horror anything. Horror movies.

No. No more horror. No. No. No.

>> No more. I just saw the other day there

was some new thing. I don't I won't even

say it. And I was like,

>> you don't want that. I don't want that.

I don't No more movies about being

attacked in your own home.

>> No, no, no. That's terrible. Those are

terrible movies. I never watch those

movies.

>> Me neither. I never I don't want that.

>> No.

>> No more. We either want to laugh or we

want to cry. Pe like laugh or cry.

Period. The end. That's it.

>> Um Well, I feel like you should do a

movie with Melissa McCarthy.

>> I think I should, too. I would love

that.

>> Yeah. God, you're so funny, Coleman. Oh,

thank you.

>> You're so You can do anything.

>> Thank you.

>> You can wear lime green. You can PULL IT

OFF.

WELL, THANK YOU FOR MY EGG.

>> OH, this has been so great.

>> So fun. We've been talking for an hour

and a half and it just went by so fast.

>> So good.

>> And I I just love being able to call you

a new friend.

>> I feel that way, too.

>> Thank you for doing this. Congrats on

everything. I'm always excited about

whatever you're doing and like a true

true fan of your work. So, thank you.

>> I'm a fan of you in every single way.

Thank you.

>> Thank you so much for doing this.

>> Appreciate it.

Coleman, thank you so much. It's so fun

to be around you. You're just a joy and

and thank you. Thank you so much for

doing this show. And you know, Coleman

and I talked about a lot of things. We

have a lot of shared similar experiences

being pretty much the same age growing

up in the East Coast. But we did mention

Dance Party USA. And for those of you

that uh haven't uh seen any clips of

that, do yourself a favor and go to

YouTube and watch uh Dance Party USA.

kind of was like a very suburban version

of American bandstand like soul train

you know without the soul um and it was

on in the 80s

just there's such incredible hair um

such 80s hair tons of hairspray

incredible outfits and it's just kids

dancing um to the hits at the time and

what was so fun about Dance Party USA

was of course Kelly Ripa was on there we

that was the first time I saw Kelly, she

I think she went by a different name,

but um but also uh they just would like

talk about the relationships that they

were having and that that people were

dating and breaking up. So, it was like

a t it was like a soap opera with no

lines and lots of dancing. Dance Party

USA. Check it out. It's a time capsule.

Um thank you so much everybody for uh

listening to this episode of Good Hang

and all the episodes and can't wait to

do more for you. Thank you. Bye. See you

soon.

You've been listening to Good Hang. The

executive producers for this show are

Bill Simmons, Jenna Weiss Berman, and

me, Amy Polar. The show is produced by

The Ringer and Paperkite. For The

Ringer, production by Jack Wilson, Cat

Spalain, Kaia McMullen, and Alia

Xanerys. For Paperkite, production by

Sam Green, Joel Levelvel, and Jenna

Weiss Berman. Original music by Amy

Miles.